Since the day I was bornt, no I think it's supposed to be since the day I went to schools, I've started causing troubles for myself.
Probably not in kindergarten cause I think I'm too young to think about all those shits when I was in kindergarten.
Starting from the day I went primary school, I've always thought about my future.
Probably around std 4, 5, 6 where I have my own way of thinking.
Books always giving us information telling us that we should get a post in club or societies, teachers always educate us about how getting extra posts will increase your chances of getting scholarships and stuff.
We're mostly being educated saying that we should join clubs & societies, if you could, just get a post.
If you can't, you still can communicate with people by getting into clubs and societies.
I was a librarian around std 4, 5, 6 (not really sure about which year I've became a librarian since it's not a permanent job).
I was a class rep when I was in std 6.
Secondary school was kinda...I don't really know how to describe.
I forced myself ok probably not literally forcing it but yeah I wasn't happy.
I became a permanent librarian when I was in form 1.
I went through the interviews which made me kinda suffered cause I came from a Chinese primary school and the interview was done in English.
But ofcourse it's an experience to me.
I went through tests, training and stuff and I became a librarian.
It's actually a good thing that I became a librarian. I improved my English, at least I get the chance to speak English.
Later, I joined Chinese debate team.
To be honest I joined just to improve my skill in speaking to public, I wasn't interested in debate until lately.
Probably I was just a little bit interested in it.
Then I joined xueji. This made me learnt a lot of stuff.
Of course, besides than theoretical & practical stuff, I learnt about how to deal with people, how to speak to the public and feeling for being left out.
I've always had this feeling of being left out there, i just don't know why.
It's like no matter how hard I tried, I still can feel there's a gap between us.
Maybe I'm bornt to be an introvert person, or A social person.
I just kind of hate socialising lol, but I still had to do it.
Cause that's what you will do, for the future.
No matter what job you'll be working on, you'll still have to communicate with people.
You still need to have network in order to succeed. And ofcourse you must have potential orelse nobody would care about you.
Social networking is important.
I'm struggling with all this club shits lately.
I just can't deal with people.
Probably I'm just like what they said, I'm living in my own world for too long.
What I wanna say is, if I'm living in my own world, trust me I won't bother to care about what you said.
Or maybe I would just burst out and scold the shit out of everyone LOL.
I just wanna say that all those basic shits if you seriously can't do it, I'm really speechless.
I can't do anything about it though.
So darn freaking fed up with all these people. 😁
It's alright. I'm gonna be alright.
First, you should be decisive.
Second, you should know that there's not much time left, shouldn't you just erm try to solve this out or pass it to me?
Third, you shouldn't be rushing to do those stuffs when those basic thing like time are not decided.
Forth, we can be friends but partners are a bit difficult.
Fifth, I will try my best to cope with you, hope you will do so too.
That's all.
One more thing. I really hate those irresponsible person which doesn't attend meeting.
Please, since you're committee just put some effort in it can you? CAN YOU.
Not referring to all the committee, only those who doesn't put effort in it.
Tbh, if you don't wanna work don't wanna help out don't wanna come for meeting might as well don't become committee.
Really really disappointed.
Why do I have to face these people everywhere.
If you choose to go paktoh over coming for meeting, please try to think if I do this what would you feel.
Please try to put yourself in my shoe, try to understand how I feel for you to treat me like this.
Sigh all I can say is..........all shits.
Alright gotta stop complaining.
24/11/2014 Mon
晚上 2343
